Sir And. Here's the challenge, read it; I warrant there's vinegar and pepper in't. Fab. Is't so saucy? Sir And. Ay, is it, I warrant him: do but read. Sir To. Give me. [Reads.] Youth, whatsoever thou art, thou art but a scurvy fellow. Fab. Good and valiant. Sir To. Wonder not, nor admire not in thy mind, why I do call thee so, for I will show thee no reason for't. Fab. A good note: that keeps you from the blow of the law. Sir To. Thou comest to the lady Olivia, and in my sight she uses thee kindly: but thou liest in thy throat, that is not the matter I challenge thee for. Fab. Very brief, and exceeding good senseless. Sir To. I will way-lay thee going home; where, if it be thy chance to kill me, Fab. Good. Sir To. Thou killest me like a rogue and a villain. Fab. Still you keep o' the windy side of the law: Good. Sir To. Fare thee well: And God have mercy upon one of our souls! He may have mercy upon mine; but my hope is better, and so look to thyself. Thy friend, as thou usest him, and thy sworn enemy. ANDREW AGUE-CHEEK. Sir To. If this letter move him not, his legs cannot: I'll give't him. Mar. You may have very fit occasion for't; he is now in some commerce with my lady, and will by-and-by depart. Sir To. Go, Sir Andrew, scout me for him at the corner of the orchard, like a bum-bailiff: so soon as ever thou seest him, draw; and, as thou drawest, swear horrible; for it comes to pass oft, that a terrible oath, with a swaggering accent sharply twanged off, gives manhood more approbation than ever proof itself would have earned him. Away. Sir And. Nay, let me alone for swearing. [Exit. Sir To. Now will not I deliver his letter: for the behaviour of the young gentleman gives him out to be of good capacity and breeding; his employment between his lord and my niece confirms no less; therefore this letter, being so excellently ignorant, will breed no terror in the youth, he will find it comes from a clodpole. But, Sir, I will deliver his challenge by word of mouth; set upon Ague-cheek a notable report of valour; and drive the gentleman (as, I know, his youth will aptly receive it) into a most hideous opinion of his rage, skill, fury, and impetuosity. This will so fright them both, that they will kill one another by the look, like cockatrices. Enter OLIVIA and VIOLA. Fab. Here he comes with your niece: give them way, till he take leave, and presently after him. Sir To. I will meditate the while upon some horrid message for a challenge. [Exeunt SIR TOBY, FABIAN, and MARIA. Oli. I have said too much unto a heart of stone, And laid mine honour too unchary* out: There's something in me, that reproves my fault, That it but mocks reproof. Vio. With the same 'haviour that your passion bears, Go on my master's griefs. my picture; Oli. Here, wear this jewel for me, 'tis Vio. I will acquit you. Oli. Well, come again to-morrow: Fare thee well; A fiend like thee might bear my soul to hell. Re-enter SIR TOBY BELCH and FABIAN. Sir To. Gentleman, God save thee. Vio. And you, Sir. : [Exit. Sir To. That defence thou hast, betake thee to't of what nature the wrongs are thou hast done him, I know not; but thy intercepter, full of despight, bloody as the hunter, attends thee at the orchard end: dismount thy tuck,t be yaret in thy preparation, for thy assailant is quick, skilful, and deadly. Vio. You mistake, Sir; I am sure, no man hath any quarrel to me; my remembrance is very free and clear from any image of offence done to any man. Sir To. You'll find it otherwise, I assure you: therefore, if you hold your life at any price, betake you to your guard; for your opposite hath in him what youth, strength, skill, and wrath, can furnish man withal. Vio. I pray you, Sir, what is he? Sir To. He is a knight, dubbed with unhacked rapier, and on carpet consideration; but he is a devil in private brawl: souls and bodies hath he divorced three: and his incensement at this moment is so implacable, that satisfaction can be none but by pangs of death and sepulchre: hob, nob, is his word; give't, or take't. Vio. I will return again into the house, and desire some conduct of the lady. I am no fighter. I have heard of some kind of men, that put quarrels purposely on others, to taste their valour: belike this is a man of that quirk.§ Sir To. Sir, no; his indignation derives itself out of a very competent injury; therefore, get you on and give him his desire. Back you shall not to the house, unless you undertake that with me, which with as much safety you might answer him: therefore, on, or strip your sword stark naked; for meddle you must, that's certain, or forswear to wear iron about you. Vio. This is as uncivil as strange. I beseech you, do me this courteous office, as to know of the knight what my offence to him is,; it is something of my negligence, nothing of my purpose. Sir To. I will do so. Signior Fabian, stay you by this gentleman till my return. [Exit SIR TOBY. Vio. Pray you, Sir, do you know of this matter? Fab. I know the knight is incensed against you, even to a mortal arbitrement;* but nothing of the circumstance more. Vio. I beseech you, what manner of man is he? Fab. Nothing of that wonderful promise, to read him by his form, as you are like to find him in the proof of his valour. He is, indeed, Sir, the most skilful, bloody, and fatal oppositet that you could possibly have found in any part of Illyria: Will you walk towards him? I will make your peace with him if I can. Vio. I shall be much bound to you for't: I am one that would rather go with sir priest than sir knight: I care not who knows so much of my mettle. [Exeunt. Re-enter SIR TOBY, with SIR ANDREW. Sir To. Why, man, he's a very devil; I have not seen such a virago. I had a pass with him, rapier, scabbard, and all, and he gives me the stuck-in, with such a mortal motion, that it is inevitable; and on the answer, he pays you§ as surely as your feet hit the ground they step on: They say, he has been fencer to the Sophy. Sir And. Pox on't, I'll not meddle with him. Sir To. Ay, but he will not now be pacified: Fabian can scarce hold him yonder. Sir And. Plague on't; an I thought he had been valiant, and so cunning in fence, I'd have seen him damned ere I'd have challenged him. Let him let the matter slip, and I'll give him my horse, grey Capilet. Sir To. I'll make the motion: Stand here, make a good show on't; this shall end without the perdition of souls: Marry, I'll ride your horse as well as I ride you. [Aside. Re-enter FABIAN and VIOLA. I have his horse [to FAB.] to take up the quarrel; I have persuaded him the youth's a devil. Fab. He is as horribly conceited of him; and pants, and looks pale, as if a bear were at his heels. Sir To. There's no remedy, Sir; he will fight with you for his oath's sake: marry, he hath better bethought him of his quarrel, and he finds that now scarce to be worth talking of: therefore draw, for the supportance of his vow; he protests he will not hurt you. Vio. Pray God defend me! A little thing would make me [Aside. tell them how much I lack of a man. Sir To. Come, Sir Andrew, there's no remedy; the gentleman * Decision. † Adversary. Stoccata, an Italian term in fencing. Does for you. Horrid conception. will, for his honour's sake, have one bout with you: he cannot by the duello avoid it: but he has promised me, as he is a gentleman and a soldier, he will not hurt you. Come on, to't. Sir And. Pray God, he keep his oath! Enter ANTONIO. Vio. I do assure you, 'tis against my will. Have done offence, I take the fault on me; If you offend him, I for him defy you. Ant. One, Sir, that for his love dares yet do more Than you have heard him brag to you he will. [Draws. [Draws. [Drawing. Sir To. Nay, if you be an undertaker, I am for you. [Draws. Enter two OFFICERS. Fab. O good Sir Toby, hold; here come the officers. Sir To. I'll be with you anon. Vio. Pray, Sir, put up your sword, if you please. [TO ANTONIO. Sir And. Marry, will I, Sir-and, for that I promised you, [To SIR ANDREW. I'll be as good as my word: He will bear you easily, and reins well. 1 Off. This is the man; do thy office. 2 Off. Antonio, I arrest thee at the suit Of Count Orsino. Ant. You do mistake me, Sir. 1 Off. No, Sir, no jot; I know your favour well, Though now you have no sea-cap on your head.Take him away; he knows I know him well. Ant. I must obey.-This comes with seeking you; Makes me to ask you for my purse: It grieves me 2 Off. Come, Sir, away. Ant. I must entreat of you some of that money. For the fair kindness you have show'd me here, I'll lend you something: my having is not much; Ant. Will you deny me now? Is't possible, that my deserts to you Can lack persuasion? Do not tempt my misery, As to upbraid you with those kindnesses That I have done for you. *Laws of duel. Vio. I know of none; Nor know I you by voice, or any feature : Than lying, vainness, babbling, drunkenness, Ant. O heavens themselves! 2 Off. Come, Sir, I pray you, go. Ant. Let me speak a little. This youth that you see here, I snatch'd one half out of the jaws of death; Relieved him with such sanctity of love, And to his image, which, methought, díd promise 1 Off. What's that to us? The time goes by; away. Ant. Lead me on. [Exeunt OFFICERS, with ANTONIO. Vio. Methinks his words do from such passion fly, That he believes himself; so do not I. Prove true, imagination, O, prove true, That I, dear brother, be now ta'en for you! Sir To. Come hither, knight; come hither, Fabian; we'll whisper o'er a couplet or two of most sage saws. Vio. He named Sebastian; I my brother know Yet living in my glass;† even such, and so, Tempests are kind, and salt waves fresh in love! [Exit. Sir To. A very dishonest paltry boy, and more a coward than a hare his dishonesty appears, in leaving his friend here in necessity, and denying him; and for his cowardship, ask Fabian. Fab. A coward, a most devout coward, religious in it. Sir And. 'Slid, I'll after him again, and beat him. Sir To. Do, cuff him soundly, but never draw thy sword. Sir And. An I do not, Fab. Come, let's see the event. [Exit. Sir To. I dare lay any money 'twill be nothing yet. [Exeunt. ACT IV. SCENE I-The Street before Olivia's House. Enter SEBASTIAN and CLOWN. Clo. Will you make me believe that I am not sent for you? * Ornamented. + In the reflection of my own figure. |